Karma Clearing Program - Gone for a toss!

I can't believe that it is already four years since I started trying Karma Clearing Program.  I have posted the results of 2011, 2013 and 2014. All reported failure / partial success (however you want to perceive!!). This year, it is a total flop! Every single rule was broken on every single day. I did not even remember the program till last week! When I was looking for an article link to be included in a new article, I accidentally looked at my earlier Karma clearing program progress article. That is how I remembered the program :-(

I have never been successful on all 9 days with the first two rules "No expression of dissatisfaction" and " No criticism" since the time I started. This year, it was worse. I expressed my dissatisfaction and criticism in ferocious manner many times, though some times, I did not express it! Some times, I did not express immediately but I expressed it later - may be with more intensity as a result of bottling up the emotion! If there is any negative marking, this year would have got me only that!!

"Observe actions and thoughts" was the only rule I was following religiously till last year. This year, even this rule was broken on many days. I felt there is no connection between my thoughts and actions. I thought of something but did something else. Even though I did not think of acting, I acted and I did not act even though I wanted to act and thought about the action very well! I missed to even observe how I am thinking, why I am thinking what I am thinking etc.! But still, I would say, this rule was followed to an extent while all the other rules were completely gone!!

"Arise earlier" and "One major meal a day" were the simplest ones. But my sleep pattern was random this year! My sleep quota increased in the first quarter of the year; second and third quarter it touched the lowest limits that I slept only for a couple of hours a day sometimes. But the pattern was so erratic that I can not say I rose early! My eating pattern was equally bad too! On some days, I ate much more than my usual to the extent of two full meals and on some other days, I did not even have one full meal!

"Help some one without leaving a trace" was a big flop again. I could not  / did not even help those who asked for help forget about helping without leaving a trace!! The next rule is to meditate once at least before sunset! This is another practice with twists this year. Interestingly, though,  I learnt a new meditation technique this year, I can not say this rule was followed! I was not able to meditate since March! My concentration level was so very poor - it still is! I hope to improve soon!!

I got so many opportunities for doing something that I dislike - not only an hour a day - but more than that. But I did not even think that it is an opportunity to shed out Karma and leave the baggage quickly! Instead, I resisted and fought against the need to do the most disliked activities. When any new disliked activity crossed my way, I cribbed! However, I should also agree that I could do certain things against my ego and liking - in fact, I did somethings that had the potential to shatter my ego completely! In the upcoming year, I am setting out to do something I like but has certain elements that I do not like. It is almost like, the unlikable elements are overshadowing the likable  aspects and making the whole initiative a painful process. Let me give a try to follow this rule.  This is going to be my intrinsic motivator to do that work! Who knows, I may become a saint by the end of it :-)

I completely forgot to "recall the day in reverse at bed time (starting from bed time and traversing through to dawn)". Only today, I am thinking restarting it!!! Though I did not follow this rule, I realized the science behind it. If you have to recall the day in reverse order, you should have been conscious of what you are doing; you should be "present" all the time. Harvard university proved the effectiveness of techniques to be "present" which includes speaking with alphabets instead of words, that is, instead of using words to form a sentence, you will use the spelling of these words to form the sentence and communicate your intent. this practice makes you more attentive; you start to become more intentional about communication. I thought that as a person I strongly believe in intentional living and live intentionally without leaving things to chances!! But, it does not seem to be so! There are several things that were tacit, involuntary, unconscious (not even subconscious :-)!!!) I will try to be more intentional in the future!!

Overall, I am writing off 2015 in this nine days nine rules journey and hoping for a better 2016!!